Growing up most young girls watch numerous movies about love, happily ever afters and prince charmings. But as those young girls grow up and experience love for the first time, most realize that it is most definitely not filled with happily ever afters. No, instead most of us discover that with great love comes great pain. And once we feel that great pain when our first love doesn’t work out the way all of those movies and cheesy novels told us they would, we give up. Once we’ve been disappointed once, or maybe twice if you’re on the optimistic side we slowly start to give up on the idea of a happily ever after. Instead we start to be content with relationships that are safe, okay, boring, easy, etc. Why do we do that? Because once we’ve been disappointed enough we lose hope in the type of love that is shown in all of our favorite movies, the ones we watch with tissues, ice cream and a group of best friends.
But why should we lose that hope and settle for something that doesn’t awaken our soul? We shouldn’t. You may be lonely and just want someone to keep you company, hold your hand and keep you warm at night, but YOU DESERVE MORE. Everyone deserves to have the kind of love that we think only exists in the world of fictional movies, but it can exist in the real world too. It has to or what is truly the point of this journey? If the object of life isn’t to be genuinely happy, then I need a refresher on how to live. John Lennon said it perfectly, when asked what he wanted to be when he grew up he replied ‘happy.’ Obviously his teachers didn’t think he understood the question, but he told them they didn’t understand life and he was exactly right. The object of life is, at the end of the day, to be happy and can you be happy if the person next to you doesn’t give you butterflies when he/she walks into the room or doesn’t cause your face to light up with just the mention of their name. These things may be cliché, but it’s true. Everyone deserves to have someone standing next to them that drives them wild and never fails to make them incandescently happy.
Now don’t get me wrong, I know the world isn’t a perfect place and therefore life and love aren’t going to be perfect. There are going to be times when the person you love makes you unhappy or just plain pissed off, but if they still make you smile through the tears or the anger, despite how hard you try not to then it’s worth the work. So please, don’t stop looking for a love like the movies, Katy Perry said it best in one of her lesser known songs: ‘if it’s not like the movies, that’s how it should be.’ So please, stay positive and give love a try.
P.S. you should see the movie If I Stay and (probably) read the book.